A man walks into a whorehouse and tells the receptionist that he wants to get fucked. So she tells him to go up to room 23, he looks around for a while and finally finds it, knocks on the door and says, "I want to get fucked!". The girl on the other side says, "OK, slip a twenty under the door". He searches his wallet, pulls out a twenty and slips it under the door. About 10 minutes later, he knocks on the door again and says, "Hey, where's my fuck!!". The girl says, "You've just been fucked, want to try again??"
A guy walks into a bar with a huge gorilla. The bartender asks him what the deal is and the man says that the gorilla has been specially trained so that when he hits the animal in the jaw, he gives him a blow job. The bartender doesn't believe it so the man pulls his arm back and punches the gorilla in the face. The gorilla gets up, brushes himself off, and gives the man a blow job. He has to perform the whole trick again for the barkeep, who still doesn't believe it. The man finally asks the bartender if he wants to try it. "Sure," he says, "just don't hit me as hard as you hit that gorilla."
A sailor is talking about the last time he was on leave... "So it was the first fuckin' leave in six fuckin' months. I dropped off my fuckin' uniform at the fuckin' YMCA, went to a fuckin' bar, and picked up a fuckin' broad. I took her to a fuckin' hotel, laid her out on the fuckin' bed, and had sexual intercourse."
They are f***ing funny!
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